The Jesus arc sucks, I mean come on, it doesn't have any of the gore, sex, or intrigue of Samson, Jericho and David arcs. It's just about some hippie walking around and preaching about shit no one cares about. The only good thing is when he's finally tortured and crucified.
The Revelations arc looks promising though, even if it is a blatant rip-off of End of Evangelion.
>he didn't think the alternate reality spin-off Paradise Lost isn't the best in the franchise
Typical KyoAnusfags and their source material.
SHAFT Revelations adaptation when?
And you didn't see anything yet. Just watch the gospels.
fucking gary stu piece of shit. got what he deserved
The only part that was good since messiah arc was the las one, shit was fucking symbolic and a masterpiece
>not dropping it when it was at the release the jews from egypt arc
worst decision ever
Come on, the whole david arc was rich in plot
betsabe best girl
Yeah but the previews for when he comes back look badass.
and no everyone knows that pharoahs daughter the wife of solomon is best girl hell she even won the harem
Jesus arc is a fujo paradise.
Judas kissed Jesus?
>lol not rly I was jk
solomon is worst then kirito and youma
dont hate the playa hate the game
solomon a best he made hell his bitch
Shit taste. I bet you didn't like Ecclesiastes too.
I mean he's so fucking op, the wisest and richest man on history with the biggest harem ever?
Not even onii-sama is that fucking overpowered
Numbers and Psalms worst arc
Mary is mai waifu
Judas a best, Peter a shit
Can Jesus kill servants?
Dat NTR tho
Mc is his own father ans is narcissistic as fuck, its okay.
mary a shit, esther a best
So Jesus is the also the Holy Ghost and God? This is the most inconsistent piece of shit ever written
>Joseph is so beta he actually accepts the child
Judas did literally nothing wrong.
i think he meant the mother not magdalene
Why did he kill himself?
>inb4 author does a bullshit asspull and have him mysteriously revive
You know it'll happen.
Yes, the NTRing slut.
welcome to 2000 years ago
Why did New Testament turn into such a tame piece of shit with no redeeming quality whatsoever, I knew Christianity becoming popular would ruin it
Blame KyoAni for doing S2.
revelations was great tho
Song of Songs adaptation when?
Overrated shit just like Jesus arc.
Old Testament is best testament, prove me wrong.
revelations was a bunch of pretentious 2deep4u bullshit is what it was
>liking the chuuni arc
>not old testament
>but m-muh shonen!!
do you even read the bible?
>reading LNs without pictures
>he didnt play the VN
>reading the poorfag's version
>Ends with him fucking both of his daughters
I didn't read this for incestshit
>Reading a LN full of plotholes.
Mahomet anime when
Why no book of Enoch arc?
Angels fucking shit up and breeding with the sons of man to create Giants.
Did they not think it was canon?
too much for Moeshitters to handle?
Just like on SEED once Jesus came back from dead it all went to shit.
Is Jesus gay for John?
>being an onlymangafag
Jesus arc is fujoshi pandering.
>reading the revisionists version
the real version is the one where he and his apostles were little girls
They totally ripped off the whole Antichrist thing fro m Miura
>tfw the Resurrection arc will never be animated
David and Jonathan were better fujo pandering anyway
He certainly didn't covet his neighbors wife.
>so i create those two. and don't give them the capacity to understand good and evil
>but i tell them to not eat the fruit
>but they can't understand that it would be a bad thing to do so
>they eventually eat it because one of my other creations tells them to
>now i finally can be a dick to them and thousand of generations to come, as i already foresaw with my perfect omniscience, and everyone will blame her, not me
>creating a gamebreaking fruit to begin with
God's ruse cruise never ends
Have you watched the Apocrypha OVAs yet? I'm not entirely sure because it's been a while, but it might have been in there.
God confirmed for Kubo
It's like how that serpent allllll the way back in chapter one is probably just a snake but they decided to connect him to Satan because they're lazy and can only think of one main villain
>The only good thing is when he's finally tortured and crucified.
Edgemaster in the building
>Generic shonen bullshit.
I'm glad BONES didn't animated that kind of bullshit.
>watching the fanmade films
i bet you draw OCs on deviantart too
>Jesus died and came back
>John the Baptist stayed dead
Jonah was a huge asshat
Nahh man Book of Enoch is an OVA in itself
>Jesus is the Tsukkomi/Tsundere
>Animated by KyoAni
Will you watch it?
>making Mary a milf AND a Christmas cake
I'm impressed by such ingenious omnipandering.
>not the joker best friend of the MC
I'd watch an actual bible adaptation. I'm christian and still don't know shit about it
After Saint Young Man I can't accept Jesus as anything besides the boke
Bros always dies because for the shitty gary stu MC and development.
I really hate that shit.
RIP in pieces best boy.
Yeah, fuck you, Akame ga Kill and Takahiro.
They killed my bro John the Baptist.
Eat shit edgelord
He was your husbando. Admit it.
You think the Jesus arc is bad, try the arcs written by Paul. Dude has some sort of cuckold NTR denial fetish. He makes the Jesus arc look like fun times.
You may say she's a Christian cake.
Why is Thomas such a shit
Magdalene best girl ;_;
What can't Jusus do?
I stopped reading during Moses' arc.
Are they still in Egypt?
Save his husbando Judas
>King James fags
You folks are scum. You think your precious little TV movie edited version is so superior. Fucking secondaries. Try reading the original VN, faggots.
Bring Ed's mother back to life.
It's been ages since that, because timeskip
>Saul tries to genocide the Christians
>Gets blinded, becomes Paul
>Then acts as if he was Jesus' best pal, and acts as if he's more righteous than Peter.
Paul is worst apostle.
>he hasn't watched the harrowing movie yet
That fujobait Sodom and Gomorrah filler was the worst
Dem doujins, tho
>short and concise
>simple story with no muh prophecies bullshit
>doesn't even need to add the retarded resurrection arc (but got tacked on by editors later)
Why is Mark so based?
in b4 Qfags
Who has the 2nd highest power level?
At least that arc had Lot fucking his daughters, Jesus arc it's just SoL and fishing shit with an all main male cast and barely any cute girls, the worst kind of fujobait
Why are Lot's children both massive sluts?
not to get off topic but the original story of sodom and gomora was that Sodom was yaoi heaven and Gomorrah was yuri heaven, they just changed both to yaoi because they thought male homosexuality is worst than female one and was the more prevalent
Samson arc. God, I hate that fucking ending.
Why is god such an asshole? Is he actually the villain?
Who's the spookiest Angel?
Antiyuri fags are the worst.
The old testament was way better, all this new crap is just to appeal to normalfags.
Overleveled clerics are pretty interesting.
10 fucking plagues? They gave him all the powers. Way too overpowered Gary Stu.
and dont get me started on that pillar of fire bullshit
I thought that was just him abusing drugs.
Solomon is the strongest magus
Forced drama is forced
Joshua is mai husbando
Die in a holy fire, Mastema.
Jacob or Samson?
I know you guys probably think Samson, but remember, God had to cheat to beat Jacob in a wrestling match.
throne angels, literally glowing rings of light checkered with eyes
>Liking the slut.
>implying that was god
that was an angel and samson has bonus points for killing the jews of his time
His movie is GOAT though
Samson before delilah
>reading gary stu chuuni LNs
At least Gabriel was into incest with her brother.
Wait until The Oecumenical Councils data books are released...
Is there a bigger asspull than Jesus reviving?
The beginning and the end of Job's arc
the last plague that hit egypt
>muh lambs blood
the fucking angel of death would be the last thing afraid of blood
Would you watch a Book of Job adaptation animated by Shaft?
>Can resurrect the dead
>Surprised when he resurrects himself
>Incest with her brother
The fuck are you talking about?
The Mark of the Beast.
What is the entirety of he Old Testament?
Seriously, it's like they were told to just throw caution to he wind and disregard any and all forms of conventional story telling.
I tried to just enjoy it for what it was for, but they used THAT the great flood way too soon. If /a/ hadn't hyped up the upcoming Revelations OVA I probably wouldn't have picked it back up.
NIV is best subs, KJV is for weebs
Japs making an LN about Islam and getting suicide bombed as a result when?
Old writer followed the zero no tsukaima route and bailed on us
Western censorship really this hard in its entirety.
>not reading it in the original latin
fucking secondaries i swear
Magdalene is a slut and she fucks other guys to!
Have fun with your UNDERSTANDING nonsense, I'll be enjoying God murdering everyone for no reason.
>implying anything else before the churches latin translation is canon or original
are you some kind of heretic anon?
This thread actually makes the Bible seem like a fun read.
>not reading it for the plot
>not even aramaic
old testament is in hebrew you dingus
What if I am, I didnt expect a kind of spanish inquisition on /a/
Which arcs are filters?
God is truly best villian.
>understanding the alphabetized jew
>He didn't read the Bible
יהוה did nothing wrong
>not being a jew
I'm sick of this fanfiction that keeps portraying him as the main character though.
This thread reminds me that I'm going to Israel in a few days.
Is there anything I should look out for, other than rockets?
>not reading the bible
you wanna be left behind with nicholas cage?
not even judeo-christian
gtfo with osama you terrorist
They really are the worst. Not only do they add their own chapter of fanfic and call it canon, they also say it's the only 100% accurate canon. It's one thing to be a secondary, but to rank your secondary fanfic above the original? Delusional.
no seriusly i lost $12,000 to pickpockets alone
Beware the merchant
Once you get past all the setup and get to the hype god being a dick part, things are great. It just has a slow start. Also, don't read the New Testament, not by the same writer and is a shit story with gay pandering.
>reading zankyou no terror
>yfw Lucifer went full yandere and Satan tries to NTR Eve
Was not expecting that.
I seriously hope you lost that through credit cards or something and were not stupid enough to carry 12 grand in your pocket in a foreign country.
It was my first time and i was naive, i had always thought it was safe since it was israel and all meaning no muslims
>I thought it was safe to bring 12 grand to jew central
>God may never whisk you away in a fiery chariot from this gay earth
>In 2006, the official number of Arab residents in Israel was 1,413,500 people, about 20 percent of Israel’s population. This figure includes 209,000 Arabs (14% of the Israeli Arab population) in East Jerusalem, also counted in the Palestinian statistics, although 98 percent of East Jerusalem Palestinians have either Israeli residency or Israeli citizenship. Most Arab citizens of Israel are Muslim, particularly of the Sunni branch of Islam,
>being more afraid of muslims than jews when it comes to money
>being afraid of anything more than jews when it comes to money
not to go all /pol/ but they are always right
There will never be an anime about Jesus and the Apostles as little girls. Why live?
Because committing suicide makes you go to hell anon.
People can only see Jesus when they accept her into their hearts.
Ignorant fools go about their lives every day without realizing that Jesus is by their side.
The rapes are symbolic for the misuse of religion for political means.
Jesus and the bible are pure evil
>smashing children into rocks
>If you are unlucky and have a miserable life full of suffering you'll grow up evil and be thrown into hell
>angels coming down onto the battlefield and eating the flesh men and their horses
>in the end your entire existence will revolve around worshiping Jesus 24/7.
>mfw you know atheists wanna jump in this thread and sperg, but because they've never read it and all they think they know about the Bible comes from googling inconsistencies, zeitgeist and Religulous, they know they'll get called out on their shit.
Ha, told you
>implying atheists and agnostics are not sometimes just as well read when it comes to the Bible.
Sure, the average fedoratard atheist is pretty ignorant, but a lot of non-religious people come from a religious upbringing or have otherwise read the myths themselves and just choose not to believe.
nigga i was raised in the most catholic environment available and even went to a monastery for high school hell i needed to learn the 20 mysteries of the rosary before learning basic algebra and had to read the bible cover to cover during the weekends
Do you believe in good parenting?
yes, if i had one
>Catholic that became atheist
I AM SHOCKED!
>implying im catholic
>implying im athiest
YOU WA SHOCK!
So what are you then?
Catholics are the worst fanbase, and are ruining it for everyone.
They are to Christianity, what California is to America.
ExDeath, pls go and stay go
Whoa, thread about catholics.
I had an extremely strict and bigot upbringing forced down my throat starting from a certain point in my childhood, and the only result is that I sided with demons, monsters and whatever atagonized the good christians in every piece of fiction I ever laid my eyes upon. the shadow side is, my favorite girl in general is the one that sides with the evil church. example: currybutt
I also do volunteering at my local soup kitchen, managed by friars, but I still refuse to do the fucking sign of the cross
>not a cute and horny onee-sama
Ara ara! Is it time for your second cumming already?
Not your blog.
Proverbs is the most pretentious and boring arc I've ever seen, just some guy telling us what he we already know.
>tfw the entire series is one giant build up as to how YWHW is the final bossu and also an eldritch monstrosity and that the devil is in on the whole ordeal
Come on OP this thread is only funny when you do it once every couple months, not every week
David became much worst than Saul.