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File: Yuno11.jpg (330 KB, 1600x1131)
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If, hypothetically speaking, my parents had a girl who was 10 years younger than me, and, hypothetically speaking, they then died in an unfortunate accident, would I, hypothetically speaking, be likely to win custody assuming I was fiscally capable of supporting her?
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hypothetically speaking, how old are you?
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Anon, do remember what I told you about murdering people?
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?????
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>>10282437
24 hypothetical years.
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>>10282456
If you look like a functional, responsible adult, then I'd say so.
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>>10282456
hypothetically, then probably yes.
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Let's say that hypothetically you'd win custody, would you hypothetically post pics of her on 4chan? Naked? Hypothetically speaking, of course.
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Yes.
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then wouldn't, hypothetically speaking, she be your sister? Or are they your step-parents?
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Hypothetically speaking, wouldn't a girl your parents had be your little sister. So hypothetically speaking, you would kill your own parents to gain custody of your own sister?
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killing your parents is wrong, anon, who else will you sponge off of?
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>>10282490

Hypothetically, she's my sister. She's also hypothetically turning 12 this year, not 14. ("10" was heavily rounded.)

>>10282527

Accident.
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>>10282588
Inheritance.
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Hypothetically speaking, I don't think we're talking about things hypothetically, here.
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>>10282427

This sounds like a good manga plot. Aishiteruze Baby meets Koi Kaze.
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What are you doing posting on 4chan, Mr. Humbert?
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>>10282728
Now you're just getting hypothetical.

Hypothetically though: the court will award custody of a minor to whoever is in the best position to take it. If you can demonstrate fiscal, logistical and emotional capability, you will most likely receive custody as the closest surviving relative.
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>>10282427

I suggest buying a new computer that's not full of loli and CP beforehand. If they're worth their salt, they'll check.
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did you ask god why, why, why did they have to die
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>>10282737
Isn't it a giant cliche already anyway? Parents die simultaneously in a contrived-sounding accident, kids somehow manage to live alone.
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>>10282818

My childhood love for the Boxcar Children series says yes. But I can't recall any series that specifically used this setup. Well, except probably an untranslated loli dojin someplace.
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>>10282728

Hypothetically, one of them is in the critical care unit right now.
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>>10282894 Boxcar Children

MASSIVE NOSTALGIA.
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>>10283078
I'm feeling it too.
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Boxcar Children was good until the original author died or something and they started having other people write the books.

I recall reading another similar series as a kid that just had a girl orphan in it, where a bunch of the mysteries were tied to historical stuff. But I can't remember the name for the life of me.
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THE BOXCAR CHILDRENS ;_;

did anyone save any doujins of those
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Hypothetically speaking, you should put it in.
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>>10282952
Hypothetically go for it.
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does she look anything like yuno?
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Hypothetically, what does the will say on the issue?
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24 so yeah, you'll get custody unless you got a greedy aunt or something.

Aren't you hypothetically sad about your parents though? And aren't you hypothetically a moral person? Assuming this topic is on /a/, one could think you would be hypothetically planning to rape your sister.
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>>10283281

Wait, they have Boxcar Children dojinshi? I'm not sure whether to be disgusted or start demanding source.

Actually, now that I think about it, I remember finding the whole Henry-Violet situation rather incesty even when I was reading it as a kid.
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>>10283413

fuck, now i have to go down to the library and see if there was any hot incest insinuated in any of the books
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poor kid
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>>10283507
I hope to god one day you find yourself Meru,

find yourself posting on Animesuki forums that is.
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>>10283450

I doubt it got as far as insinuation. They just seemed rather excessively close.
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>>10283388 moral person

On 4chan? AHAHAHAHAHAHA
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>>10282427

I like the way this anon thinks.
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>>10283388

>sad about your parents?

Hypothetically yes, but it'd hypothetically ruin my reputation as an internet tough guy if I admitted it.

>a moral person?

Well... I'm ethical.

>rape your sister?

To be non-hypothetical for a moment, no. I'm not going to. She's having quite a bad enough year already without me going Orphanage of Darkness on her. I obviously implied it on purpose in my post, but that was just because "wow, this is the best rape setup ever" was among the thoughts I've had and I thought /a/ would appreciate the joke.

Also, to answer the person who asked the question about wills, last I knew the plan gave custody to my mother's aunt and uncle (my great-aunt and uncle). Who are great people, but so old that they're at least pushing 70. I'm a bit worried about their competency.

So, uhm, I'll go back to fretting and remembering that /a/ isn't my blog now, unless someone else has some helpful insight or can lighten my spirit.
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>>10284536

Keep this in mind. 2D>3D

Most little children around 12 years of age are annoying bastards/bitches IRL. I don't know about your sister, but unless she's a special case you'll be regretting your decision once she settles in. If you are a bastard, she's going to hate you. If you are a pansy, expect to get your life tied down in her petty desires.

If you're the sort of guy who'd do well with a little sister. ex. like themain characters of kanon/air, then you may have a chance
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>>10284635

Personality-wise, she's a pretty caring little girl. But she's also so much younger than me that she's practically an only child, and she can be pretty temperamental if you piss her off.

Really, what I'm more worried about is whether she'll end up hating me as some sort of living incarnation of "your parents are dead lol". For half her life I've been more visitor than family, and the half that I was there she was so young she probably barely remembers. Oh, that and the fact that I have no practice being a parent.

Of course, there's still a small chance my dad will recover, in which case all this worrying is over a moot point.
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>>10285206
Your father is going to die, soon your life will be more miserable than it currently is, enjoy.
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>>10285206
At the very least, drop in more often if your uncle/aunt live close by. Custody of a fourteen-year old kid when you're twenty-four doesn't sound like fun.
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this thread is amusing and needs to be screen capped
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>>10285277

Actually, my great-aunt and uncle do live pretty close to me... but we both live in a completely different part of the country than my parents. And she's 12, not 14. The "10 years younger" thing was rounding.
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OP WANTS TO KILL HIS PARENTS AND PUT HIS SISTER IN HIS BASEMENT TO RAPE EVERYDAY WHEN HE COMES HOME FROM WORK!

YOU SICK FUCKER!
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>>10285330
Oh come now, be fair. He might keep her in the attic or a closet instead.
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>>10285390
Or her room, except with locks and boarded up windows.
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This thread is,hypothetically speaking, the most sane mindfuck I have ever seen.
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>>10285450

Actually, I was thinking I'd get her a nice suite of rooms, with a bedroom and private bath with one-way mirrors in it.

Just kidding. But thanks for reminding me of yet another stressful complication: I'm going to need my own house or at least a larger apartment.

I wonder how hard it would be to find contractors willing to install one-way mirrors in a bathroom anyway?
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>>10285675
Contractors never struck me as particularly moral types, probably pretty easy.

Or you could just install it yourself.
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>>10284536
Talk to your great aunt and uncle, and ask them if it'd be ok if you took care of her most of the time, except maybe weekends or something, so they could see and spoil her. They may agree. That'd be the simplest custody negotiation ever.

Also:
* Birds and bees talk, sex and dating edition.
* Periods for newbs talk.
* The first few kids she decides to date and let you see. How will you handle them being stupid kids?
* Can you comfort her properly when you've lost both your parents suddenly too? Someone has to. [faggot][cliche][true]A little girl's heart is a precious thing that needs to be protected from the worst the world has to offer long enough to grow[/faggot][/cliche][/true].
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>>10285796 Contractors never struck me as particularly moral types

Somebody post that one Darker Than Black scene with the nigra.
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>>10285900

Anon delivers.
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I'M HYPOTHETICALLY GREATLY DISTURBED AND WOULD CALL THE FBI BUT HYPOTHETICALLY I'M JUST GONNA GO AND HYPOTHETICALLY JACK OFF TO THIS HYPOTHETICAL SCENARIO.
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>>10285866 * Periods for newbs talk.

I... didn't even think about that. (Can't I just give her a book or something?)

That's actually a pretty good idea overall though, and one of the things I was considering.
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TRAIN YOUR VERY OWN GUNSLINGER GIRL
YOU CAN DO IT FAGGOT
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>>10285866
girl here. i never got the birds and bees talk or how to take care of my period. this maybe a good thing or a bad thing.

in b4 no girls on the internet
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What if you found her using 4chan?
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>>10286087
But the loli isn't the nearly dead one. Wouldn't he have to make it, like, Gunslinger Father?
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>>10286103
That would be the perfect opportunity to discuss incest.

"Oh well, look at this incest thread on /a/ (that I created btw), what do you think sis' ?"
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>>10285569
>sane mindfuck
Hypothetical HAX!
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no, special agent brother sister hot loli incest squad, i would so watch that shit
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>>10286096
not really a problem, they teach it in the schools. If anything does happen post about it like that blindmute loli guy.
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>>10286103

What >>10286132 said. Incestual dickings all around!
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Do you have a girlfriend? Will she be ok with it?
If not, are you the classic ronery anon who won't ever look? If not, how will you ever manage?
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>>10284536
If your hypothetical uncle/aunt get custody through the will you can ask them to pass custody to you (which a court should go for if all parties agree). If not, you can still challenge for it based on their inadequacy and argue that your hypothetical sister would be better with you. You'd have to speak to a hypothetical lawyer though if you really wanted to push the case. I would probably encourage it, because growing up at hypothetical age 12 with some people stuck in the 1940s would be pretty lame.
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>>10285866
>A little girl's heart is a precious thing that needs to be protected from the worst the world has to offer long enough to grow.
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>>10286164
ha, no. i learned about it on the internet and my stepfather showing sexual r-rated movies to his 8-9 year old daughters.
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>>10286276
And that's why you're on 4chan.
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>>10286224 Do you have a girlfriend?

My parents are dead/dying and I posted about it on 4chan to get it out of my system. Does this sound like a person with a girlfriend to you?
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This thread is, hypothetically speaking, awesome.
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>>10286325
What? I thought this was a hypothetical scenario.
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>>10286325
>>10286340

But you know, it's, hypothetically, only Anonymous speaking.
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>>10286340

see >>10284536
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>>10286238
Asuka is fucking ugly in that picture, just so you know.
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>>10286164
>they teach it in the schools.
They teach state sanctioned medical facts in U.S. schools. She'll have to get all her practical information from her also 12 year old friends, movies, the internet etc.

FUCK DAMN, THE INTERNET. Besides the birds and the bees, there'll have to be The Porn Talk. If Disney can create furries by accident, wtf could /d/ do to a little girl trying to forget her parents have just died by searching for the secrets to adulthood? And /d/ isn't even really that bad. There are bad places on the internet.
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>>10286340
>Hypothetically,My hypothetical parents are dead/dying and I hypothetically posted about it on 4chan to get it out of my hypothetical system. Does this sound like a hypothetical person with a hypothetical girlfriend to you?
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>>10286434
>And /d/ isn't even really that bad.

Actually, /d/ is one of the nicest board of 4chan.
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>>10286434
you can, you know, block sites.
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>>10286434
This is anon we're talking about. His version of the porn talk will probably be on how to best avoid viruses and shitty paysites and why 2d is superior.
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hey OP

one fucking question
is your imouto DO WANT OR PIG DISGUSTING?
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>>10286650
The one I got basically said "hide the stuff from your mom".
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>>10286721
you SICKO. How can you ask that, his parents are dead and his sister is left parentless. I can't believe it.
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>>10286499
>block sites.
Never work. Too many ways around, including friends' connections and unsecured or public access, to name a couple non-technical ones. You know how we know about computers? Next round of kids will know more, earlier, automatically.
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>>10286751

I'm the one impacted and I'm telling rape jokes. Chill out.

>>10286721

I posted Yuno for a reason.
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>>10286766
Depends. Not to stereotype, but generally a girl wouldn't really care enough to learn how to get around the filter.
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>>10286650
Does a porn talk involve actually showing her porn? Does it involve having to explain the concept without examples? I never had one. I grew up when porn = playboy, so hiding it was still feasible.
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>>10286804
wow, someone actually believed me.
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>>10286859

No, I realized you were probably joking. It's just that it framed the absurdity of this whole topic for me and I thought it was funny.
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>>10286815
Children are curious and creative. Just the knowledge that there's a block will keep her receptive to the idea of getting around it. If she's the biggest air-head girly girl in the world, she can still just ask some boy to show her how. I refuse to believe that little girls aren't also curious about porn.
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ITT, orphans.
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>>10286925
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Girls can begin masturbating at the age of nine, even younger.

House agreed, don't bother him about it.
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>>10286965
in b4 leaning episodes.
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>>10286965
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Onii-chan is listening to you masturbate to proxied porn and telling Anon about it. Run little girl, run.
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Front page says this is a popular thread, lol.
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>>10286815

She's actually pretty good with computers. Probably as good as I was at that age, and I could get around filters easy as hell, so... yeah, so much for defending her innocent little mind.
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>>10287114
So periods, birds, bees and porn.
Make slides, and post them for our review.
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>>10287164 periods, birds, bees and porn

Hmm, interesting... these things get better in certain combinations of 2, worse in any combination of 3, and OH THE HORROR OH THE HORROR if you have all 4 in the same place.
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I'm now going to sleep and dream about me and Yuno, my little sister, living together and happy.

sweet dreams, /a/non...
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>>10287235
Have fun, but you're not the OP (because I am) so... confusing post much?
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I want you to know I was masturbating in the third grade and I didn't even know what it was called or that sex makes babies until about 8th grade. Sitting through those classes really covered more of diseases then anything.

(Shirou.jpg)
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>>10287272

My parents showed me how sex worked using a rather whimsical illustrated book involving these weird robot/train things. ...Which was creepy as fuck now that I think about it.
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>>10287388
best manga ever
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Anyone else reminded of Kodomo no Jikan?

Well, OP: Ask yourself if you want to take care of her, not only if you can. If you really want to, then you should be okay. Don't remain distant from her though and stay strict.
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have fun being reiji. raise her to be your perfect wife.

actually, 12 is a bit too old, huh.
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>>10287367
My parents never said a word to me about sex and they never even really kissed in front of me.

It was kind of creepy having a gym teacher explain to me what a penis and a vagina were. Imagine knowing that something that looks like a slightly skinnier Rosie O'Donnell has a vagina.
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>>10287505 never even really kissed in front of me.

Mine have... err, had, a habit of kissing for 15 seconds at least once a day, since it's supposedly good for your marriage and encourages romance. Good for them. Annoying for me because they'd interrupt about anything for it, including conversations.
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>>10287505
haha. imagine walking in on your parents having sex when you're in sixth grade.
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>>10287724

Sounds like it would mostly be confusing.
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>>10287679
The problem is I don't know how to kiss (though I don't think the chance will come any time soon).

Hypothetically, if you do gain custody of this girl OP, expect her to either become really withdrawn or really slutty. Unless, of course, you can provide proper guidance to her.
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>>10287785
Well, you'd get lots of practice.
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>>10287724
My mom was hot when I was in the sixth grade. I'd probably be pretty screwed up.
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>>10287745
nah, i knew what sex was when i was in fourth grade or so.

why is my life so horrible.
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>>10287812
mother son doujins.
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>>10287817
Because you're anonymous and causality is running backwards today.
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>>10287912
In b4 Void
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>>10287940 Void

You mean the 5 dimensional hyperGO guy? Because otherwise I'm drawing a blank.
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>>10287812
?
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>>10287812

Pics.
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Hypothetical situations: Anons way of asking for legal advice?
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Give your sister up for adoption and spend all your inheritance on booze and anime figurines.
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>>10288295

God help me I loled.

Anyway, I have a flight to catch in the morning, so I'm going to bed now. Thanks anon, you've been emotionally supportive in your own twisted way.
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WTF? Yuuno image and no "oh god my nutbladder"? WTF is wrong with /a/ today?



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