My body was filled with hatred for Shinji.
Welcome to years ago.
inb4 re-take was bad fanfiction *monocle*
keep reading faggot
I'm willing to bet you didn't read RE-TAKE, and have only read this one page of it.
Actually, Re-take is the only time that Shinji isn't a huge faggot.
Fuck, you caught me.
RE-TAKE was fucking awesome. Best ending Eva could have ever had.
HURR, because the text of my post isn't a line from another portion or anything, you dumb namefag.
Re-Take was shit.
Move on people.
Used to hate him for not helping her. Took me years to get over it. I realized that was the best death Asuka could have. I learned to see the joy and beauty in it. ;_;
You're shit. Get the fuck out.
Enjoy your bad fanfiction hentai
MEANWHILE IN THE MANGA. SHINJI CHOKES OUT KAWROU.
The original series is superior.
>>Re-Take was the shit.
...in the end please die with me.
>>Re-Take was the shittiest fanfiction ever.
Kawrou's appearance in Re-take is funny as hell.
re-take had a happy end which made me smile, sure it had the plot of a child's picture book but it had some well drawn eva's fightan
Don't make me post Shinji's Nightmare Cataclysm.
Well, now you pretty much have to.
Above them on the streets of Tokyo 3, Unit 01 and Shinji were still being fucked. Nearly passed out from blood loss and pain, Shinji's body was limp in the blood stained cockpit as the two mega cocks continued to tear into him. His crotch area was torn wide open and his bladder and intestines were hanging out a bit. Shaq and Kobe were laughing like crazy as they fucked Unit 01 relentlessly.
"Oh man, I haven't had a good fuck like this since I screwed Phil Jackson!" shouted Kobe as he thrust his cock into Unit 01's pussy.
"You fucker, I knew you two were sleeping to geather!" replied Charile as he rammed Unit 04's cock deep into Unit 01's ass hole.
"Haha what the fuck ever man, thats in the past." replied Kobe. "Lets just fuck this bitch and......"
Suddenly a panel on the street between Unit 03's legs opened and a weapon case shot up at nearly Mach 5, slamming into the EVA's exposed nuts.
"HOOOOOOLY FUCKKKKKKKKKK!!!" shrieked Kobe as Unit 03 was launched into the air by the impact. It then fell to the ground and curled up into a ball holding its seriously injured nuts, whimpering in pain.
Charile looked on in confusion. "What the hell just happened?" he wondered as he stopped butt fucking 01 for a moment.
Just then a larger panel next to the weapon case opened up. Unit 02 shout up like a rocket, grabbing the weapon as it sprung into the air, flipping and landing next to the crippled Unit 03. 03 tried to get up, looking up to see the barrel of a combat shotgun in its face.
HEEEEEEEEERE WEEEEEE GOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
That is the finest thing I have ever read.
Shinji went off camera a moment and returned with a medium sized box and an empty toilet paper tube. Gendo strained to look behind him and could hear vicious noises coming from the box.
"You know we here in Japan have a different culture from you American guys but I think there are certain things that go across cultural boundaries." said Shinji to the camera. "Music, sports, food.... we all like those things. And there is something else we all like to do. And that is......... SHOVING GERBILS UP PEOPLE'S ASSES!!!"
"Oh god no......" moaned Gendo.
Shinji pulled a gerbil out of the box. It was foaming at the mouth and gnashing it teeth threateningly.
"Awww isn't it cute?" said Shinji petting the little guy. "You see, I figured normal gerbils would be a bit boring, so I got these special rabid gerbils."
"No please..... you can't......." begged Gendo, breaking down into tears.
"Don't be scared Daddy." said Shinji sympathetically. "This is perfectly safe, that fag Richard Geare does this all the time."
He was never a faggot, he was a 14 year old troubled boy.
Misato came up behind PenPen and picked him up. He thrashed and screeched in terror as he saw the size of the cock that was about to go up his virgin penguin ass.
"Now, slam him down on my super cock." commanded Shinji.
Misato nodded sadly, and then raised PenPen up high above her head, slamming him down hard onto Shinji's huge cock.
PenPen screamed like never before and his eyes nearly bugged out of his head as Misato held him down on the cock. She held him there or a while and his screeching died down and became more of a whimpering.
"There there PenPen, its ok." said Shinji with a friendly smile as he patted the head of the trembling penguin. "I know you will learn to like this. Misato, please continue."
Misato began thrusting PenPen up and down on Shinji's dick rapidly. PenPen screamed in torment as his small penguin asshole was tore wide open by Shinji's cock. Shinji smiled as he watched Misato's large tits bounce every time she brought PenPen up and down.
"Misato, PenPen here is apparently not having as much fun as I am." said Shinji.
PenPen's dick immediately hardened, extending to its full 2 inches.
"Wow PenPen, you sure are well endowed for a penguin!" said Misato happily, pretending like this wasn't the first time she'd had a sexual encounter with PenPen.
PenPen gradually began to get into the mood and was soon chirping happily and Misato jacked him off. It wasn't long untill his small penguin dick blew its load, hitting Shinji right in the face.
"YOU FUCKER!! HOW DARE YOU SPEW YOUR PENGUIN SEED ON MY FACE!!!" roared Shinji in anger, punching the hell out of PenPen.
PenPen shrieked in pain as he rocked back on Shinji's dick then swung back forward on it, like those rockem' sockem' blow up balloons from the 80's.
"Wow cool." said Shinji, as he punched PenPen every time he would bounce back forward on his dick. "This is so much fun!" he laughed as he beat the hell out of the poor penguin.
"Shinji stop it!" pleaded Misato. "Don't tell me you didn't expect PenPen's sperm to hit you in the face with him sitting in your lap like that!"
"Eh, I guess you're right." said Shinji as he stopped hitting PenPen.
"All this fucking has made me hungry." said Shinji simply.
"Wha..... " gasped Misato, her eye's going wide as she realized Shinji was heading for the oven. "No Shinji don't!" she pleaded.
Shinji ignored her and opened the oven and threw the wounded penguin in. He closed it after him and turned the heat on to maximum with a sadistic grin.
"Shinji please...." cried Misato.
"You know, I've always hated PenPen." said Shinji absently. "I've hated him ever since that day I opened the fridge to get some Kool-Aid and found him in there jacking off all over the lunch meat. Bastard."
PenPen began screaming and thrashing around as the heat in the oven quickly rose. Shinji laughed at his agony. Suddenly, PenPen burst into flames, flapping around like a rabid animal.
"Awesome." said Shinji in amazement. He had never seen a penguin die like this before.
Misato fell to her knees crying, not able to watch as her pet was baked alive.
>"Now, slam him down on my super cock." commanded Shinji.
my head just imploded
>PenPen gradually began to get into the mood and was soon chirping happily and Misato jacked him off. It wasn't long untill his small penguin dick blew its load, hitting Shinji right in the face.
Most hilarious thing I've ever read.
>"Now, slam him down on my super cock."
This made me lol.
OH GOD SHINJI YOU JUST KILLED GOD!
Lookin kinda GAR there Shinji.
"Wow PenPen, you sure are well endowed for a penguin!" said Misato happily, pretending like this was the first time she'd had a sexual encounter with PenPen.
Made me lol.
I'm laughing way more than I should. Bastard.
Anyway it goes on in that vein for 500 pages (shinji burning misato's face off with a hot carl, shinji impregnatng maya with dozens of fetuses who have a constant orgy in her womb, shinji fucking unit 1 and getting stuck in it's ass, etc) but I'm not posting it all.
This is just as horrible to read as the Potemayo rape fanfic.
Link, I swear I will read every single page of that shit.
Shinji's mind raced as he heard the man's footsteps leading over to the urinals. What the hell was a little girl doing in the men's room? Suddenly Shinji realized that her mother must not be around so the father had to take her to the men's room. Letting out a sigh Shinji got back to jacking his dick, however this time being more quiet so as not to alert the restroom's other two occupants.
"Oh Misato make me cum, make me cum all in your glorious pussy!" thought Shinji excitedly as he rapidly jerked off, reaching his orgasm.
Just then the door to his stall opened.
Shinji's moment of ecstasy reached its peak to the screams of a little girl.
"DADDY THAT BOY JUST SHOT SPERM IN MY EYE!!!" she screamed.
Shinji's eyes snapped open. He stared in horror at the little girl squirming on the ground clutching her right eye.
"OH MY GOD I JUST BUKAKED A SIX YEAR OLD!!!" cried out Shinji in horror as he stood up and tried to back away from the scene before him. Unfortunately there was nowhere to go.
The chapter names alone are funny.
Neon Penetration Evangelifuck is going to be great, I can tell.
Complicated signup is complicated
Agreed. Someone post a rapidshit of that.
To fucking put in a date of birth and a fake name?
Holy shit, fucking lazy fucks.
oh sweat jew gods. i cant tell if i should be laughing/crying or indifferent but i have somehow managed to place myself in all 3 states at once.