I'm 19 years old, I have no motivation, no goals in life, I got diagnosed with depression 5 weeks ago.They put me on Wellbutrin.I hate being around others I prefer being alone, I constantly lie cheat and steal, I do things I know are fucked up but feel no guilt for my actions. If 1000 people died and I got $10 I would take that trade in a heartbeat. Most people aren't sentient they're mindless drones, about 0.5% of the population has a soul.I'm shit at long term planning and am constantly setting myself back and hindering my progress. I'm in the worst shape of my life, but the pills are helping me lose weight.Is this more than depression?
That's nice, dear. Wanna make a 3D model of a donut?
>>707395Fuck wrong board, please disregard my post.
>>707393It doesn't get better anonbut only you can change your situation to something that makes you suffer less.remember that in life pain is inevitablebut suffering is a choice.
>>707393lmfao what a pussy bitch
>>707393Fucking blendlets I swear.
>>707393You sound like a sociopath tbqhfam. It's you, not them, who lacks a soul. Embrace your nature. Download Blender, set up a Patreon, start making degenerate porn.
>>707393>diagnosed with depression>no motivation, no goals in life>shit at long term planning and am constantly setting myself back and hindering my progress.Sounds like ADHD with co-morbid depression and the lack of empathy for other people isn't healthy either.Could be that your Brain is so low on Dopamine that you are constantly burnt-out which could be an explanation for your anti-social feelings. Was this lack of empathy always present in your life? Definitely get a good psych-doc to look into it, doesn't sound like Depression alone. I have ADHD with co-morbid Depression. Ask me anything.
>>707431>I have ADHD with co-morbid Depression. Ask me anything.What's a good way of doing engravings in zbrush.
>>707393Sounds like life fucked you up, if you think people are soulless there's most probably a reason for that. You realize it's unnatural so likely not something you were born with. If you were unfixable, you wouldn't mention 1000 for $10 as it would be completely obvious for you. So that's good news (this is a reply to sociopath claims).Pills won't help alone, you need support and care. Also perhaps a good psychiatrist because want you're describing might as well signalize early schizophrenia, it starts very similarly so it's important to rule it out. As a schizo I see a few red flags in what you're writing. Especially people seeming like drones, issues with planning, motivation. It's often misdiagnosed as depression and if what you're describing has started recently or through teenagehood, that's the onset age. Don't want to scare you, but find a good psychiatrist, the damage to the brain it causes is irreversible and I've gotten fucked up by doctors not diagnosing it early.Also, people change the most around this age (19-23 or so) so you'll most likely be a different person in a few years. That's something to look forward to.
this is the most Blendlet post I've ever read in my life
>>707433I've never done it and i don't have the patience for it, but i would create the engravings in a vector program as height maps and use them in zbrush as such.
>>707393this happens when you use shitty open source software.
>>707451We all use open source software. How do you think you're connected to the internet, retard.
>>707425Don't humour him with the sociopath moniker its just an edgyboi narcissist with delusions of grandeur. Get outside more, join a fucking sports team or something and interact with actual people. I know, 'reee the normies don't understand me' - it doesn't matter, you'll be less of an autistic outcast and feel less shit if you interact with others even if you don't like doing it. Also OP, I have to ask - what is the best way to do matchmoving with Houdini 17.5?
t. OPYou're just a 19 year old bud, its normal. Ride it out and try not to get too deep into the pharmaceutical industrial complex. It will pass. You're not special or unique for feeling this way its just teenage bullshit. Ignore the armchair psychologist in this thread.
>>707393Get off Wellbutrin. It will destroy your life.Yes you have more than depression. Find what you enjoy doing in life. You know what I'm talking about. You have thought about it. Just do it. If you do it and still feel like shit, then end yourself or go back to the pills that will turn you into a permanent mindless drone cuck.Just do it. You and I both know what it is.
>>707393You honestly sound like a complete pussy ass bitch in every way, shape, and form. I took that shit when I was 15-20 as well. Doesn't do jackshit. Honestly, who the fuck isn't depressed? That's a bullshit excuse. You just sound like an wannabe, tryhard, edgy teen. Pills helped me lose weight too. Doesnt mean it's going to help your mental health. That's a you problem. Of course you're never going to move forward and hinder your progress; you set yourself up for failure before you even try. You see the negative and bad in everything and everyone before you even consider a positive.Look, you're never going to make it in this industry, in life, in general; if you never put in the actual work and discipline. You know you're fucked up. Either do something about it and move forward, even if its in the smallest of ways. Or shut the fuck up and stop making threads die for shit like this.
>>707393>Most people aren't sentient>0.5% of the population have a soul>I want to imagine I'd kill 1000 of them for a pittance.Sounds like you're the one without a soul, anon.But then again you're still in that young adult chuunibyou stage. You probably think edgy is a personality and not just the manifestations of a mind that is too dull to manifest any real passions. Don't worry, if it's just teen-angst you will grow out of it eventually and look back at this stage of you life and cringe. If it's not just teen-angst then you'll probably just become some loner neet hanging out in your parents basement until they eventually bite the bullet and kick your slacker ass out. You'll probably fantasize about being Rorschach and you'll buy anime figures you can jerk off on to substitute for the sickening emptiness inside you. You'll find an internet forum somewhere full of broken empty manchilds just like you and you'll try to out edge-lord each other posting your manifestos and rants against NPC culture never realizing it's not them who are the broken toys, it's you.In any case you've come to /3/ so if you want to learn how to model stuff and build your own little virtual edgy worlds and then run your own little sad angsty plays in them you've come to the right place. Who knows maybe this will give you a goal, maybe this will help you find a passion and maybe this will prevent you from becoming yet another impotent neet who rages at the world for not fixing him.What sort of stuff are you looking to create OP?
the only valid advice. >>707425
>>707484>What sort of stuff are you looking to create OP?Shitty threads, mostly
>>707490>If 1000 threads died and I got 10 keks I would take that trade in a heartbeat.it checks out
>>707452Actually we all use closed source software. Why do you think thebos is called windows? Because it breaks ya fool. If your gonna come, cum inside.