[a / b / c / d / e / f / g / gif / h / hr / k / m / o / p / r / s / t / u / v / vg / vr / w / wg] [i / ic] [r9k] [s4s] [vip] [cm / hm / lgbt / y] [3 / aco / adv / an / asp / bant / biz / cgl / ck / co / diy / fa / fit / gd / hc / his / int / jp / lit / mlp / mu / n / news / out / po / pol / qst / sci / soc / sp / tg / toy / trv / tv / vp / wsg / wsr / x] [Settings] [Home]
Board
Settings Home
/3/ - 3DCG



Thread archived.
You cannot reply anymore.



File: IMG_7586.jpg (1.13 MB, 3264x2448)
1.13 MB
1.13 MB JPG
K, so, i made this abomination for a finals in my highschool.
Im going to shamelessly put it in here hoping someone will see it.
My school taught me nothing so i had to teach myself.
I accept and want to recieve any criticism you may have (which you will)
>>
cool pic OP but its not much of a video
>>
>>563289
Wow, i am for a good start aren't i? Eh, it's been a long day.
Here ya go: https://youtu.be/X_L7J3pEQMM
>>
>>563289
Wew boy there's a lot you can optimize here.
Strictly speaking of animation your ship feels like some kid playing with a toy car. It moves unexpectedly and seemingly unhindered by what one would expect the dynamics of space to be like.(void, objects drifting, propulsion and gradual acceleration, constant adjustment of trajectory which may lead to a lot of rolling, drifting, etc)
The pilot's hand feels so rigid. You should work to make it fluid. Like when he or she pops the cassette and presses the button. I'd expect his finger to bend/arch a slight bit because it is pushing something. Try pressing on a button and relaxing your hand after. See how it looks and try to implicate that into the animation.
>>
>>563291
From a technical standpoint there's a lot to improve on, but the actual video is pretty nice. Don't know why but I just like it. Here are my critiques:

1. Commit to your style.

You have a mixture of cartoony, untextured materials and realistic space backgrounds. Pick one and stick with it, don't mix and match.

2. Think about your lighting better.

The asteroids are a deep shade of purple, but they look like they're lit very dimly and the lighting is too diffuse. In space there would be almost zero light diffusion and everything would have very sharp shadows. I'm assuming the light source was a purple light, in which case it needs to be brighter, or at least you should have more contrast between light/dark on the asteroids.

3. Use a better glitch/distorion overlay (Don't know what to call it.)

The constant horizontal noise thing doesn't look great. It needs more variance for one, since it looks repetitive. It could also be composited better. I'm guessing you used After Effects or something to put VHS noise over the video, but maybe try a different layer mode to make it look more realistic.

4. Spend more time on your animations.

Make things ease in/out and have them move more slowly.

5. Do a better job with the planet's atmosphere.

building an atmosphere shader is time consuming but definitely worth it. Anyone can see through a transparent sphere.
>>
You have a nice taste for retro aesthetics, the detailed space background ruins it though, you should've gone with a minimal starscape of dots.

And seeing as this is basically a music video, you should have cut the shots and animated to the music, to give your video punch, otherwise it comes off as a random assembly of scenes.




Delete Post: [File Only] Style:
[Disable Mobile View / Use Desktop Site]

[Enable Mobile View / Use Mobile Site]

All trademarks and copyrights on this page are owned by their respective parties. Images uploaded are the responsibility of the Poster. Comments are owned by the Poster.